something witty i don't know?

hey awkward thing over here

“I also have a strange heart quirk: I develop oddly deep emotional connections to people in my life that are one-sided. I may be just a passing character to them. I don’t know what that is. I don’t know why that is. I can have one encounter with somebody and feel connected to them and read a lot into that. They become very important people to me, but to them I may just be like, “Oh yeah, we talked that one time, right?” To me it’s a life-changing moment that bonded us; to them, it was a five-minute polite chat in passing.”

—   Marc Maron, Attempting Normal

From the opening pages, this book is making me realize how much I have in common with a former cokehead Jewish stand-up comedian who is my parents’ age. (The answer: a lot. “In my mind… IN MY MIND”)

Teehee

Half-Wit

Greetings from 2007!

After the worst House M.D. episode I’ve seen so far (“One Day, One Room”) comes the best House M.D. episode I’ve seen so far (“Half-Wit”). How much do I love thee? Let me count the ways…

1. Awesome piano scene with Dave Matthews(!) playing a savant. I really loved all the piano music in this episode.
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2. Cameron’s seduction trick… need I say more? I’m sure this spawned a gazillion fanfics.
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3. Chase being a big softie: “I’m sorry you’re dying. I’m gonna hug you.”
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4. House copping a feel during Cuddy’s reassuring hug, of course.
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5. And finally, when the whole team showed up at House’s door to tell him he’s not dying, like eager little children on Christmas morning about to be told there’s no Santa. So adorable.
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In.LOVE.with Kkap Min <3 My favoritest greatest female dancer in kpop (Brian Joo for male). They both do funny dances so well because they can actually DANCE, and they even make sexy funny. When she knocks the crackers out of the guy’s hand HAHAHA

scottlava:

“Ooh, child, things are gonna get easier. Ooh child, things will get brighter.”

&lt;3

scottlava:

Ooh, child, things are gonna get easier. Ooh child, things will get brighter.

<3

The only good thing to come out of watching a movie like Last Love is talking to my old roomie in real time about how terrible it is. (The scene we’re talking about is the one between the gal and the son about 1hr30min in, that literally comes out of nowhere.) Did we watch an abridged version that cut out all the scenes with character development? And all the scenes where Michael Caine actually spoke in an American accent?

(not) Meeting Conan

Last night I had a dream that I finally FINALLY met Conan O’Brien. I got to give him a HUGE hug and tell him what a longtime fan I was, and we took photos where it started as a one-arm side-hug, and then I was like “Oh what the hell” and moved my other arm up to complete the hug circle. Sort of like this sloth clutching a tree, but less cute.

It was amazing.

And then I woke up and realized that it was just a dream - my longtime wish did not come true, and my day became a deep dark abyss of heartbreak and despair. Why must you play such cruel tricks on me, brain.

tacosupremeleader:

Me, every day. 

(via owlturd.com)

Amen.

Looked up a cute comedian and found out he’s 27 - Oh he’s so young!

Realized I’m only 2 years younger with way less accomplished - OH GAWD I’M FUCKING OLD

Yup. Yes. This is me.

Yup. Yes. This is me.